“When a man is newly married, he shall not go out with the army or be liable for any other public duty. He shall be free at home one year to be happy with his wife whom he has taken.
The above verse is a repeat of what Moses has already instructed the nation in the context of going to war:
Deuteronomy 20:5-8 (ESV)
Then the officers shall speak to the people, saying, ‘Is there any man who has built a new house and has not dedicated it? Let him go back to his house, lest he die in the battle and another man dedicate it. And is there any man who has planted a vineyard and has not enjoyed its fruit? Let him go back to his house, lest he die in the battle and another man enjoy its fruit. And is there any man who has betrothed a wife and has not taken her? Let him go back to his house, lest he die in the battle and another man take her.’ And the officers shall speak further to the people, and say, ‘Is there any man who is fearful and fainthearted? Let him go back to his house, lest he make the heart of his fellows melt like his own.’
Throughout these last chapters of Deuteronomy, we read about a variety of subjects. God has given them instructions on loaning money, on man’s nocturnal dreams, on women’s menstrual cycles and even on what to do in the wilderness with your excrement. God is concerned about holiness and cleanliness in the camp of Israel. In the above passage He is concerned about the relationship within the camp. Here we read (on two occasions) that those who get married are to be allowed to have that first year with their spouse. This is God’s version of FMLA. God had the intention right away that a man and woman just married, should have that time to enjoy their honeymoon; even for a year. This should tell us a good truth about what God thinks of marriage and the bond and/or connection needed in that relationship. Even a war was not to disrupt that need. We ought to be just as honoring of married couples and making sure their connections are fostered. We ought not put demands on them and disrupt that bonding. This is contrary to most thinking and most concepts of business or even church life. Perhaps we do this differently in form and function but not in purpose and direction. God is showing that He elevates this part of marriage in order to keep strong relationships. We ought to think hard about how we foster those first years of marriage. Many new couples are also starting new careers. Once the career begins to take precedent over the marriage, a habit for life has started and the downfall has begun.
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