Then he commanded them and said to them, “I am to be gathered to my people; bury me with my fathers in the cave that is in the field of Ephron the Hittite, in the cave that is in the field at Machpelah, to the east of Mamre, in the land of Canaan, which Abraham bought with the field from Ephron the Hittite to possess as a burying place. There they buried Abraham and Sarah his wife. There they buried Isaac and Rebekah his wife, and there I buried Leah— the field and the cave that is in it were bought from the Hittites.” When Jacob finished commanding his sons, he drew up his feet into the bed and breathed his last and was gathered to his people.
Then Joseph fell on his father’s face and wept over him and kissed him.
The above verses are taken from the middle of a paragraph. Israel (Jacob) is dying. He has just finished blessing his 12 sons and grandchildren. The scene is of course, somber. The moment monumental. But the instructions specific. Israel does not want to be buried in Egypt (Neither will Jospeh ... Joshua 24:32). He wants his remains to be in his land, with the remains of his family. In the New Testament this type of discussion is not really talked about. But I am now, here, faced with my son’s remains after his sudden passing. This passage, read for years, now takes on an entire new meaning. I’m trying to navigate what that looks like. I think what we read in this passage, that there are many points to be made, but three stand out to me. These feed my hurting soul:
1. That aftermath of death is to be respected. As hard as it is and evil as it is, we are to understand that God has designed us, even in death, to be in community. Israel was dying but wanted to be with his people. That is such an amazing thought process. Yes, we know, as Christians we will be absent from our body and present with the Lord. But these things matter as God created us to connect with Him AND with each other, even in death.
2. We are to honor the wishes of the dying. This probably has some limits. But where we can, we are to try to show honor to people after they are gone, base upon their mindset when they were here. If they don’t tell us we are somewhat lost. But I believe we are to find a way to capture their hearts, in our actions.
3. It is okay to fall on our face and weep. Jesus wept (John 11:35). Our weeping is a gift from God to cleanse the mind and soul by releasing our anguish and hurt. It is designed by God. Ironically, it is weak people who typically spout that weeping shows you are weak. No, it is strong people (our Savior) who weep in the face of loss.
I am still not that clear but will make sure my son is honored in community and that even though my weeping hurts for me, it honors him!!
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