Genesis 32:13-19 (ESV)
So he stayed there that night, and from what he had with him he took a present for his brother Esau, two hundred female goats and twenty male goats, two hundred ewes and twenty rams, thirty milking camels and their calves, forty cows and ten bulls, twenty female donkeys and ten male donkeys. These he handed over to his servants, every drove by itself, and said to his servants, “Pass on ahead of me and put a space between drove and drove.” He instructed the first, “When Esau my brother meets you and asks you, ‘To whom do you belong? Where are you going? And whose are these ahead of you?’ then you shall say, ‘They belong to your servant Jacob. They are a present sent to my lord Esau. And moreover, he is behind us.’” He likewise instructed the second and the third and all who followed the droves, “You shall say the same thing to Esau when you find him,
Jacob is returning to his father’s land and must meet his brother Esau. The last time they meet Jacob had swindled Esau out of both his birth right and his father’s blessing for the first born. Esau had made a threat to kill him. That is why Jacob was sent away and, subsequently, accumulated his great wealth. Now he was returning to his brother’s land. He has been told that Esau is riding toward him with 400 men. We read the above passage that he wants to appease Esau. He wants to make sure Esau is worn out with present after present. Is doing this will, indeed, slow Esau’s heart. Note what happens when they do meet:
Genesis 33:8-10 (ESV)
Esau said, “What do you mean by all this company that I met?” Jacob answered, “To find favor in the sight of my lord.” But Esau said, “I have enough, my brother; keep what you have for yourself.” Jacob said, “No, please, if I have found favor in your sight, then accept my present from my hand. For I have seen your face, which is like seeing the face of God, and you have accepted me.
The above story might be what Solomon was referring to when he wrote these proverbs for us:
Proverbs 17:8 (ESV)
A bribe is like a magic stone in the eyes of the one who gives it;
wherever he turns he prospers.
Proverbs 18:16 (ESV)
A man's gift makes room for him
and brings him before the great.
Proverbs 19:6 (ESV)
Many seek the favor of a generous man,
and everyone is a friend to a man who gives gifts.
Proverbs 21:14 (ESV)
A gift in secret averts anger,
and a concealed bribe, strong wrath.
There is a principle here for life that we would do well to learn. Angry people will be appeased with our generosity. In our society we might call it “buttering” someone up. It should not be done as a manipulation tool, but it should be done to show honor and grace. The same honor and grace we want from them. When someone is full of anger and we have done them wrong, we should offer to make things right and to appease them by being generous and sacrificial. We do not know what was in Jacob’s heart. We do not know his motives, other than to keep himself and his family alive. But, we do read that he wants to appease his angry brother and he wants to soften his heart. God blessed this motives. Note, from the words of Esau:
Genesis 33:15-16 (ESV)
So Esau said, “Let me leave with you some of the people who are with me.” But he said, “What need is there? Let me find favor in the sight of my lord.” So Esau returned that day on his way to Seir.
Esau even offered to provide Jacob with protection. Jacob found grace in his sight. A generous heart will always prove to be a good move when dealing with angry people.
Proverbs 25:21 (ESV)
If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat,
and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink,
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